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Valentine’s Day is either a day of romance with your beloved or known as “Single Awareness Day”.  But why does it have to be that way?  Isn’t it true that you need to love yourself before anyone can truly love you?  Our society focuses so much on partnership and marriage, but what if it just isn’t part of the grand scheme of things for some people?  Why do we need to conform to the norm of falling in love, getting your heart broken, doing it again for the umpteenth time, get married, maybe have kids (social norm is to have kids), and then you’re done.  Nope, I still don’t get it and I’m married.

Let’s go over the basic forms of love from the Greeks:

  • Eros: sexual Passion
  • Philia: friendship
  • Ludus​: playful love, innocent as between children
  • Agape​: the love for all, selfless love
  • Pragma: “love that lasts a long time” usually what developed through marriages
  • Philautia: “self love” that is not selfish

We don’t take the time to get to know ourselves before we dive head first into a relationship.  We think being in a relationship makes us whole and maybe even defines us as a person.  It’s like a childish antidote of, “Nah nah nah nah nah, I have a boyfriend!”  Each significant other does help shape us into the person we are today, but are we insightful enough to see it that way?  Love can be such a mess sometimes.  But, on a more constructive note, once you have that person in your life, that good, solid partner, holidays like this fall to the wayside.  Jesse’s birthday is the day after V-Day, so we celebrate a day later with half priced chocolates and a normally priced dinner.  Maybe we’re both too practical for our own good, but why buy a dozen red roses during a time when it’s marked up significantly more than any other day of the year?

This Valentine’s Day, I challenge you to love yourself.  Love your family.  Love your friends.  Have a girl day and go to the spa.  Heck, treat yourself to a spa date alone.  Treat yourself to a nice meal and some jewelry (hey, I know a great jewelry designer).  Teach your kids that Valentine’s Day is a day of love for more than just romantic love.  It may help ease the teenage heartache of their crush not reciprocating their feelings because we all know how that feels.  Let this truly and fully be a day of love for all kinds of love.